woops

I stay fit year round, but I'm doing a kind of last minute regime in order to truly feel good about my carnival costume and the inevitable legion of pictures to come. Sooooo..I'm at the gym, on the ever efficient elliptical, in my very own zone. Because one of the few rules I stick to is: not socializing at the gym. I won't date men that I meet there, I won't make friends with people I've met there, because I make it a point not to meet anyone there. The gym is my sanctuary and you'd swear there was nobody else in the room besides myself, because that's how I move around. I love it, it's my time and no one else matters when I'm in there. I can't even train with friends to be honest. For me, socializing has no place in there.

Attempts at contact don't phase me as much as the stares. We all glance, we can admire a good looking body, especially at a place like a gym, but then keep the eyes moving. I can't deal with the fixation, maybe it's because I honestly could never be THAT interested in someone else's body, unless it was my man of choice. The woman on the elliptical next to me today, insisted on glancing at me, constantly! It is highlyyyy irritating when the person next to me either keeps looking at what speed/level i'm on, or keeps looking at me! I thought I was crazy,I thought maybe she was looking over me at someone she knew. After the 5th glance I glanced back, and she looked at me in my face and gave a "oh hello there" kinna smile. I of course was not impressed, being the anti social gym rat that I am. Now, I have unfortunatley developped the bad habit of muttering about people who annoy me. I think it's a hilarious habit that came out of nowhere and the hilarity comes from it being ridiculous. It's the kind of passive agressive action that a person like me who finds it hard to be passive wouldn't take, but I do it. If I hold the door for you and you say nothing in return I will mutter "asshole". If you're driving and making a turn and it seems like you're trying to ignore the fact that I'm walking with purpose I usually mutter "i fckn dare you to hit me". So at the gym, in the elliptical corner, this young woman is looking at me with no end in sight and then she grins when my eyes confront her, and i mutter... "fckn weirdo".


In preparation for carnival I have an ipod full of soca music, blaring in my ears, making the sound level of an unconscious mutter heighten drastically. She heard me. I had practically announced that she was a "fckn weirdo". woops! One might even describe it as a "minor yell".

She faces front for the rest of her elliptical experience, cleans the machine without a glance, and left the elliptical corner. I was shocked at myself, mainly because I was unphased. You couldn't have gotten me to feel badly. As carnival creeps up, I have become a gym monster. I go in there ready for war, a war on fat and bad health and I want nothing and no one getting in my way. The way I see it, I have an appointment with Carnival 2009, and I have to make a good impression. I should have see it coming. Before the elliptical attack, I glared at the lady who stayed on another machine longer than she was supposed to when I had signed up for it well in advance. I was going to inform her that it was my turn but I was too disgusted with her, and how irritating she looked as she ran flailing her arms like orangutan.I am a monster. I am not proud of it at all, and I'm going to adjust my attitude in the gym. But this monster's abs are coming along quite nicely :)